I had a dream the other night that I was at a huge Whole Foods, going down this long marble staircase. It was about 6 flights tall and I was going down fast and began jumping from stair to stair. First two stairs, then four and before I knew it I was jumping 20 stairs at once and found myself flying above the stairs and very far from the ground. I began to descend and thought that I would surely break my legs, but I spread out my arms like wings and parachuted down landing softly by the raspberries and blueberries.
I have many dreams like this, me in flight or landing from an incredible height or rollerblading down the highway , enjoying my body in a way that I rarely let myself do in awake life. Maybe I should take up X-treme sports for this is what my dreams feel like. But awake, I feel way too fragile to risk life and limb for the thrill.
I move a a lot, in fact, even at rest my energy is getting ready to speed away. Not only do I teach the Nia Technique for a living, I take every opportunity I can to dance and play outdoors. When Debbie Rosas coined the term “movement lifestyle” to describe Nia, I was right there on the same page. I live to move and I move to live. Whether dancing or meandering through the world of my day, I am happiest in transit.
Recently, I’ve been exploring more stillness, especially when I am not feeling well. I have been using stillness as a practice. Being still and sensing my body in stillness. In doing this, I am also cultivating an inner stillness, stillness of my mind. Movement comes to me easily, stillness does not.
Today I am not feeling very well. I have a cold and although I should rest, my inclination is to keep going. Right now, I am writing when I probably should be resting. What happens when I rest is this: At first I feel resistance, a desire to get up and drink something, or send another e-mail, or blow my nose. When I sit with this, I begin to feel the resistance as my friend, showing me how under all that energetic activity there really is a desire to rest. When I surrender to the rest, everything falls into place. I can almost feel the self healing happening in my body. I begin to participate in not just recovery from my day, but truly resting into the moment, into the space and into my sensate body.
Maybe then I will fall asleep and dream of scaling the heights and let my body heal while I continue my movement lifestyle in my sleep.