I heard an interesting thing yesterday around anxiety. When it related to the past, it often shows up as guilt, when it is related to the future, it shows up as worry, and when it related to the present, it shows up as panic. When it show up as panic, it often gets stuck in the psoas muscle and its environs. Here is the article about the Psoas that speaks to this: http://theearthchild.co.za/this-muscle-of-the-soul-may-be-triggering-your-fear-anxiety/
Anxiety can come from real dangers or preceived dangers. Most of us are not currently running away from tigers, but many of us are immersed in an environment of manufactured fear. Not that there aren’t hings to be afraid of, but our ability to deal with perceived threats in a grounded and efficient way is GREATLY hamperd by feeling guilty, worrying or panicking.
This shows up in the mind and the body in ways that are sometimes inexplicable because the part of the brain that is triggered is the reptilian brain which is focused on survival and primal and not thinking clearly. As the flight or flight muscle experiences the fear, the psoas tends to tighten up and causes all kinds of sensations and symptoms that create even more anxiety in the body.
In choosing what to bring into my awareness, it seems like there are more and more scary things to behold and fliter. My animal body wonders, what is the threat level here. What can I do about this to stay safe? What is real here? My mind is pretty good and realizing that there is a lot of hype, and a lot of denial and a lot of misinformation being passed around. Also I know that it is human nature of overdramatize, project and stay in the comfort zone. Knowing all this, has allowed my mind to stay open and fluid and relaxed. However, I have also been dealing with a lot of pain around my lower back that migrates from my left hip area to the upper right side of my back, excruciating pain sometimes that I assumed was mostly structural. Go to the chiropractor. Get a massage. Roll on a ball. Sit in correct alignement. All these things brought temporary relief but it was not until I made the psoas fear conenctiong that the pain truly began to dissipate.
I realized that although my mind was staying open to possible interpretationa and realities that may be available to me at the moment, my reptilian body/brain/mind was actually freaked out. Even now as I sit here writing, I can sense the my breath is high in my chest, not deepening and including my psoas. I have to make an effort to notice the holding, breathe into it, lovingly tell my primal self that I am here, aknowledging it, sensing it, not denying the fear… And as soon as I do this, I find the deep breath of release I have been looking for.
In my classes, I have been bringing in more sounding, more release work, more connection to the core because I realize I am not alone in this state of being. Using all the tools available, knowing what I am really working with, makes all the difference. Expanding that out into the world right now.